Love at the Mirage

Anyone who has salivated over the circus scene in the 2007 stoner movie Knocked Up would not be disappointed by Cirque du Soleil's mind-bending LOVE.

The show is based loosely on the biography of 60s rock band The Beatles. It takes place in a US$100 million purpose-built theatre within the Mirage, and uses prerecorded samples of 130 songs from the band's catalogue.

Rich with phantasmagorical costumes, a psychedelic soundscape and Cirque du Soleil's usual high standard of acrobatics, LOVE whisks its audience away on a whirlwind tour of The Beatles' absurd dreamland.

A rotund Englishman waddles around the stage to the song 'I am the Walrus', while young Lucy takes in the world from a floating windowframe. Later, tentacled acrobats fall from the sky, dipping and bouncing cheerily in an 'Octopus's Garden'.

Even without the aid of mind-altering substances, the show successfully frightens, inspires and amazes. And when it ends with 'All you need is love', a visible euphoria settles on the crowd, surviving even the painfully slow exodus of 2000 audience members through the theatre's narrow entrance.

Opera at The Venetian

Lights flicker. Cymbals crash. A collective gasp spreads from the theatre's rear, and I follow my neighbour's gaze to the ceiling -- just in time to see a crystal chandelier come crashing down into the crowd.

My heartbeat quickens, even if only for a few seconds. Soon, the theatre's five-piece chandelier swoops back into place, and as the manufactured pandemonium subsides, the cast begins to sing.

The Phantom of the Opera was made for Vegas, although composer Andrew Lloyd Webber may not have known it when the show opened in 1986.

In kitschy Las Vegas, the musical's melodramatic storyline and over-the-top melodies are complemented perfectly with truly extraordinary special effects, including trapdoor-enabled vanishing acts, and fireworks and explosions whose heat easily reaches the faces of audience members in the orchestra section.

The show runs for 95 minutes and takes place in the Venetian's US$40 million, purpose-built theatre, which is a spectacle in itself. Modelled on the Opéra Garnier in Paris, the 80-foot diameter theatre features walls that are opulently draped in red and gold curtains.

We dine that night on lobster, scallops and veal at the Venetian's Italian seafood restaurant, Zeffirino. Our second-floor table pleasantly overlooks the resort casino's renown canals, which are modelled on the streets of Venice and bathed in light from an artificial daytime sky.


Later, we visit the casino's gigantic, non-smoking poker room. I have a lucky couple of hours and quadruple my money, but some bad decision-making and a few too many overly strong cocktails send me straight back to breaking even by the end of the night.

We also visit the hugely popular Tao nightclub, and are able to jump a 50-metre-long queue thanks to some hotel vouchers, my negotiation skills, and Jim's white tuxedo. I am amazed by the decor of the nightclub, which includes barely dressed girls 'bathing' in oddly placed tubs.

Cocktails and the maze-like layout of the 120,000 square foot casino have us marching in circles in search of elevators to our suite. With heels clicking sharply against the marble floors, we finally overcome our hazy disorientation and have a comfortable, if short, sleep in our beautifully appointed suite.

Zumanity in NY-NY

A half-scale replica of the Statue of Liberty stands tall and proud by a backdrop of New York City skyscrapers.

In and among the buildings, thrill-seeking visitors whizz by in the Big Apple's time-honoured yellow checker cabs. With screams surpassing even those of true NYC commuters, they dive, twist and race along a bright red roller coaster track at speeds of up to 108 km/h.


Dubbed 'The Greatest City in Las Vegas', the NY-NY Hotel & Casino crams an astounding number of Big Apple landmarks into the US$485 million resort. Among its skyscrapers are one-third-sized replicas of the Empire State Building, Chrysler Building, Century Building, AT&T Building, CBS Building, and the New Yorker Hotel.

On the exterior lower floor, there is a pool representing the New York Harbor and replicas of the Brooklyn Bridge, Grand Central Stadium Terminal, Former U.S. Customs House, United Nations Building Assembly Hall, and Ellis Island Immigrant Receiving Station. And within the complex, areas are modelled on New York City locales such as Greenwich Village, Central Park and Times Square.


New Yorkers visiting Las Vegas often are derided for unimaginatively escaping to a replica of their home city. However, it seems that much of NY-NY cannot fully be appreciated without an intimate understanding of its namesake.

While Chinese takeout menus taped onto the doors of mock apartment buildings may arouse nostalgia in a New Yorker, the same satirical little touches may come across as mere clutter to the green eye.

When we visit NY-NY on a busy Sunday night, I find the crowded corridors claustrophobic. Like its competitors Paris Las Vegas and The Venetian, NY-NY features painted ceilings that serve as an artificial blue sky. In NY-NY, however, the sky is oppressive.

We dine at the packed and noisy Gonzalez y Gonzalez, and very much enjoy a tasty meal of (complimentary) corn chips and dip, sizzling prawns, and beef tacos. Service is exemplary and the waiter is open and honest with his recommendation of the cheaper house-blended margarita over one of the more exotic options.

After dinner, we attend Zumanity, Cirque du Soleil's adults-only cabaret. The show successfully shocks and awes throughout, from 'topless' (bodysuit-clad) front of house staff, to a six-and-a-half-foot transvestite host, kinky contortionist, flying midget, and two incredibly lithe fishbowl divers.

Unsuspecting audience members are frequently invited on stage. One honeymooning woman is 'taught' to seduce another male audience member in a dating show parody. An aging vacationer and over-enthusiastic young man are invited to join in a strange, simulated orgy. And for the finale, the spotlight shines on a couple that has been married for nearly 40 years. They take to the stage and wow the rest of the audience with a genuine, loving waltz.

Our human zoo expedition continues even after the show, as we brave the casino's weekend drunks at our favourite table games. We dodge a very drunk man with an American football-sized long island iced tea at the Pai Gow table, and thanks to Jim's very good birthday luck, make a nice profit on number 27 at Roulette.

The night comes to a lovely end with coffee and birthday tiramisu at the very good Il Fornaio Italian restaurant.


Happy Birthday, Jim!

The Stratosphere: Bite me

Standing a whopping 1,149 ft, the Stratosphere towers over Las Vegas Boulevard from the strip's northernmost end. Founder Bob Stupak may not have achieved his goal of making the Stratosphere the world's tallest building, but he certainly has set new records for Nevada.

The Stratosphere is the tallest observation tower in the USA and boasts observation decks on the 108th and 109th floors with 360 degree views of the city and the strip. Also at the tower's summit are a wedding chapel, revolving restaurant and bar, and three heartstopping thrill rides that are said to be the highest in the world.


Beside the tower are two hotel buildings housing a total of 3444 rooms. Rooms are old and sparsely furnished, but prices are some of the lowest on the strip.

We book a Deluxe King room at the Stratosphere through Expedia, which we find to offer lower rates than even the hotel Web site itself. From the parking station, we have some difficulty making our way to the hotel, as the casino entrance is on the third, and not ground, floor.

The casino itself is a brightly lit mess of slot machines and advertisements. We are accosted twice by representatives of a timeshare group while walking from the entrance to the hotel's front desk. On learning that we are Australian, unmarried, under the age of 30 and hence ineligible for their program, the second representative informs us that the group 'owns Las Vegas', and advises we use a secret thumbs up signal to avoid being pitched to again.

Hotel reception is crowded with a noisy school group, and it takes us upwards of thirty minutes to check in to our room. We later learn that the front desk is perpetually busy, and find staff curt and unhelpful.

On the evening of Valentines Day, we visit the in-house 'Theater in the Stars' for the rock revue, 'Bite'. Despite its name, the theater is located a mere one storey above casino level, but nonetheless provides a suitably dark, dramatic atmosphere for the vampire-themed cabaret.

The Stratosphere's Bite is a cheaper, inferior version of standard Las Vegas fare. The show is about a Lord Vampire's search for his soulmate; however, much more time is spent on showcasing the Lord's existing brood of erotic dancers than on developing the weak storyline.

Still, the soundtrack delivers, including rock solid hits like Guns n Roses's 'Paradise City', Bad Company's 'Rock & Roll Fantasy' and Twisted Sister's 'I Wanna Rock'. And what Bite lacks in plot, it makes up for in fleshy, writhing dances by the beautiful and athletic vampiric femmes.

After the show, we try our luck in the casino, which houses a quiet poker room, rather strict Pai Gow tables, and US$5 'crapless craps' -- a variation of craps that gives the house a little more of an edge. We are given a US$10 craps voucher for staying at the hotel and turn this into a very good meal at the in-house Fellini's Italian restaurant with a few rolls and some good fortune.

During our week-long stay at the Stratosphere, we dine also at the retro-themed Roxy's Diner, and at Lucky's Cafe. We find the former gimmicky, and the singing, dancing waitstaff can be slightly intrusive for a quick, casual meal. Lucky's is far more casual and offers a good selection of food and drink at all hours.


We are glad to check out of the Stratosphere as the week comes to an end. Air in the hotel is exceptionally dry, and the outdated in-room air-conditioning unit frequently interrupts our sleep with its death rattle. Upon check-out, we are disappointed to learn that the wireless Internet billing system is slightly dysfunctional and we have been charged twice the daily rate (US$13) on one occasion. The cashier is unable to make any changes and requests we pay the erroneous bill anyway.

One week later, I receive a US$195 credit from the Stratosphere on my credit card for no reason. The exact sum is withdrawn from my account by the Stratosphere a little while later, leaving me to foot AUD$9 in international transaction fees. Lovely.